Posts Tagged ‘chemo

03
Feb
21

… so then i realized something …

i noticed that as of late.. my art started feeling.. “stiff” .. not as spontaneous as it used to be… i thought too much about what i was doing. it felt like …. mh .. imagine a hand.. instead of being open and relaxed it was curled into a tight fist.. it happened several times that when i had finished .. or almost finished a painting.. i just overpainted the whole thing again .. using either gesso, black or white paint because i did not like it… it felt wrong, not me, so i wanted a fresh start. however, i don’t like that !!! ok.. my one excuse might be that i am going through chemotherapy.. that makes me feel incredibly tired amongst other things.. on the other hand, art is what keeps me awake, so to say… so i decided i needed to learn to let go again. instead of a tight fist.. i should open that hand and shake it lose… so… i brought my sketch book to the living room. placed it on the table and as i was watching tv the other night, i took that sketch book and a ballpoint pen … and just started drawing.. not really paying attention to what i was doing.. i just let go.. let lose.. i just went with the flow.. and it felt right.. and in the end.. THIS had happened… as i was watching TV

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24
Jan
21

…. and now for something totally different again …

ABSTRACT 106

acrylics on stretched canvas
30 x 40 centimeters – 15 x 12 inches
original for sale – please contact me for info

so.. the muse has taken me in a completely different direction again.. at least the colour scheme is sort of the same .. i need to keep busy.. it keeps me awake. my chemotherapy makes me extremely tired.. the moment i sit comfortably, i doze off and soon glide into a deep and sound sleep… not really my idea of spending the day.. and mind you.. i sleep like a log at night too… so.. instead of sitting comfortably in a chair or on my red sofa… i paint.. i let the muse guide me to new realms… art and my journey being a constant adventure !!

much love and light to you all !!!

07
Feb
17

Stickman Selfie – in case you wonder what i look like :)

today i took part in a kind of challenge… drawing a stickman selfie, showing me doing what i like doing best… which is – of course – art πŸ™‚

it was fun.. and i hope it puts a smile on your face too. my hair….. hahaha.. my hair ? … Β typical after-chemo hairstyle…… LOL πŸ™‚ and the glasses.. only when i do art.. or read πŸ˜‰ nothing against glasses of course.. but i usually don’t look that intellectual πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ happy tuesday to you !

20170206_174446

26
Sep
16

… on a more personal note

dear followers, dear friends πŸ™‚

i realize that it’s been quite a while that i have posted anything here on my blog. and what i posted, was kind of sporadic. i would like to apologize for this. for very specific reasons, i was a lot less creative over the last months.

i don’t like to talk about private matters on the net, however in this instance i will make an exception… a small one. but i feel, you all have the right to know what’s been going on, what IS going on… and how things are.

i came to switzerland in june of this year to visit my children, and to have a medical checkup. it was then that i was diagnosed with breast cancer. in july i started on a very heavy course of chemo, 4 hourly, weekly cycles. after 6 weeks i had to have a break cause due to my immune system being practically non-existant, i was close to a blood poisoning in my left arm. i had to take antibiotics and chemo was stopped for two weeks. then, it continued and two weeks ago i had the last cycle. i was lucky.. all in all. the side effects were bearable, the worst being the extreme tiredness and exhaustion – i still have that ! – the complete loss of taste – yuck to all foods and drinks – the sensory disturbances in my hands and footsoles.

in the beginning i was still capable to create art, but as the chemo sessions continued, i had less and less energy to be creative. so i really changed into a complete couch potato. i read a lot – make this past and present tense! – mostly thrillers.. but many books on art too, watch/ed TV and slept/sleep.

OK.. so far so good. i am better now… slowly getting some energy back and slowly being more creative again. today.. i have to go to hospital for more bloodtests, a CT and meeting with my oncologist. in two weeks, on October 11th, i will have surgery.

anyway. i am good. i am.. lucky to be here in switzerland. i have fabulous doctors… am being treated in a top rate oncology center… and i wasn’t even aware there being one here, in the city where my eldest son lives. i live with my son.. he is wonderful.. looking after me, cooking for me, going shopping….. my other children live close by and visit me often. my wonderful husband is at home, taking care of the house and our dogs… if he weren’t so supportive and kind, i could never manage this all !

i count myself lucky. i am here, in a fantastic place, surrounded by the alps. there is so much good and healing energy here.. can you believe it? yes i count myself lucky.. yes, i have cancer, and yes, i have accepted it. my hair is gone.. i am bald.. but … i wont wear a wig nor a scarf nor whatever… i am boldly bald.. nothing to hide ! it is another lesson i am learning, another stepping stone in my life.

i wish you all a great new week… and sending you all lots of love and light.

mimulux aka pat

 




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